Best Sex Positions for Overweight People

Posted in Girls
Thu, Oct 29 - 11:40 pm EDT | 4 years ago by
Comments: 3
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Ok, I admit it, I am a hefty dude. My body has already seen most of its glory days and I enjoy the fine art of television watching too much to mar the experience with a treadmill. So getting down and dirty means that I’ve had to consider the best positions to work with my current, ugh, girth.

My imaginings have always led to feats of sexual engineering but realizing that I am encumbered with more than my fair share of pounds has pressed that creativity to the brink. So, in light of the fact that my fellow men are more like me than Brad Pitt, I am passing my knowledge on to the masses.

Image: istockphoto

Image: istockphoto

Missionary but don’t rest your weight on your wrists! You will get tired easily and, while heavy breathing is generally accepted during intercourse, a heart attack can kill the mood. Use your elbows, she’ll think that it is more intimate because your faces are closer together and more kissing is possible. The girl will be none-the-wiser to know that you are actually not strong enough to support your own body weight for an extended period of time. Bonus points are given for the fact that your spare tire is generally out of sight during this one.

Anything on your knees. Your body will be more visually appealing while she is gazing up at you and you can use your legs for the majority of the effort. Instead of having to work the abs for thrusting, your thighs do all the work. This one is only limited by the scope of your imagination because there are numerous positions that work while on your knees.

Have her face away from you. If you are ashamed of the belly, then there is nothing better than making your female companion’s eyes not be able to access that particular part of your body. Whether you bend her over, have her on her knees, lay her on her stomach, it doesn’t matter because she can’t see you.

Get on bottom. Gravity works wonders and it will pleasantly spread your weigh out to be more aesthetically pleasing. This gives the chick the illusion of control, while actually allowing you to still get laid but not having to work up a sweat for it. If she gets tired, then you can thrust up. I recommend planting your feet and lifting up for that movement because it is easier.

Being that a big cuddly boy is never going to be named one of the world’s sex symbols; gentlemen like us are faced with overcoming our jiggly parts with other things. Most men will choose to develop a sparkling wit or infectious humor (please let that be the only thing that you pass on, as anything that requires a trip to a clinic is unappreciated) but I vote for improving your sex skills. If you are willing to have your head between her thighs until she screams in delight, then the pounds on the scale don’t matter quite so much. Now if pleasuring your lady isn’t enough and the pounds still bother you then I am left with one piece of advice. Lose the weight.

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  • Giddy Ant

    I think that over-weight people should not have sex unless they are trying to loose weight, in that case yes they should. Because the UK are trying to decrease obeasity level, so why are more boney babies being boren eh

    yours truely giddy ant

  • http://SimsGamer.com Amy Tucker

    That first comment was so funny that I had to retweet it. :0

  • Juanita Thomas

    Get a life! Fat need love too, your just mad because you can’t get nobody!!!!