“If you want your dog’s eyelashes left long, we will leave them long. If you want your dog to have a mohawk, we will give your dog a mohawk, if you want your dog’s tail colored with temporary/washable fur coloring, we will accommodate that for you!”
This doggie spa is pretty upscale. Featuring the finest of assortments in cutting edge dog fashion, they want their customers to know that their dogs special needs matter. Yet is it the really the special needs of the dogs they are referring to here?
Maybe it’s all about you.
I see it every day now, perhaps because I live in Los Angeles. Stores for pet birthday cakes. Stores for pet clothing. Stores for pet yoga. Stores to make people feel like their pets are unique individuals; reflections of themselves; symbols of their prosperity.
There is a sad loneliness that comes out of this, and a desperation to appear like one is taking care of someone besides themselves. It makes people look sophisticated to have a dog that dresses like this. Rather than being self-involved, you can now be super-ultra-involved with your dog or your cat – to unhealthy measures.
How far can this go before someone decides that something is wrong?
People who are deeply involved in the world of pet fashion seem to have gone off the deep end. There is no feeling (except extreme and vile hatred) for a wealthy lady from Beverly Hills with six tiny poodles on a leash and 20 shopping bags. This is a madness that must be stopped. These people parade around Santa Monica all the same, showing off their poor little pugs wearing tutus. Caring little for the comfort of their dogs, they care mainly about how they are perceived by others.
I think people who don’t have children are getting bored, so they have now displaced their pets into children. Their “children” must be unique, so why not create an app for dog owners to connect with other dog owners and go to dog shopping malls? Or maybe we can take our cats out to cat yoga and introduce them to other gluten-free cats who are also on cat Prozac.
Where do you draw the line from furry friend to sick desire for a child one could never raise?
It was coming across a dog birthday cake store in Pasadena when all of this got to me. An entire store for dog birthday cake! We can at least hope they catered to dog weddings. I walked into the store with morbid fascination. People seemed to be enjoying it quite a bit in there, showing off their dogs to one another in what almost seemed like a status game. The dog owners compared their dog clothing as they chatted about the weather and celebrities and definitely not politics or philosophy.
Does posing in a picture with your pet make you a more likable person? This seems to be the case. People constantly use their pets to show how kind and unthreatening they are. If you do not have a dog or a cat, people often think there is something wrong with you. I have a bearded dragon. It was actually the non-cuteness, the alien quality, that drew me to my reptilian pal. I think the way cats and dogs are portrayed now is absurd. There is an annoying level of “cute” that can become nauseating.
How many dogs and cats have their own Facebook pages? Their own Instagram accounts? What is wrong with our society? I’m waiting for the pet book store. I’m waiting to see a bunch of dogs and cats read books to each other. Books that are specifically made for dogs and cats to read.
That would be soooo cute, wouldn’t it?
And it’s all about the cute.
“Look how cute I am. Look how non-harmful I am. Look at how nice I am because I have a cute pet in a cute pet outfit. Look at how we can relate to each other because I am so kind here with my adorable little dog playing chess with his doggie chess set.”
People who don’t have children are pretty messed up now, unless they can deal with looking at themselves in the mirror. They are afraid of being alone, stuck dwelling in their own thoughts, with nobody to care for but themselves. They must feel that they are caring for someone, and if that someone isn’t a child, it becomes an innocent little cat or dog that is subject to all their repressed lack-of-parenting.
The way people increasingly identify themselves by their pets is a bit disturbing:
“My name is Jennifer. I like going to the beach, drinking craft beer, and my cats. Without my cats, I would probably be dead.”
It’s scary how much of a cult this is becoming. I mean, Los Angeles is a special place of dystopian hell, for the poor and the infamous and Scientologists. Plastic surgery was only the beginning of this downward facing decline into extreme superficiality. Known for the Paris Hilton dog fiasco, spending massive amounts of money for your pets became the new VIP luxury.
If your are living vicariously through your cats, maybe you need to take a look at your life and realize that something is empty deep inside. The amount of businesses preying on gullible pet owners is increasing, as commerce is driven further toward the superficial and inane. I remember when the childfree movement took off. People identified as being childfree, because everyone around them had children. How long before a petfree movement begins?
Do people really care about their pets, or do they care about showing off their pets to others? Like mothers showing off their children in school, choosing their each and every outfit, these pets become a reflection of their owners personal issues. Perhaps they do care about their pets, but I know people who have specifically stated that they are getting cats or dogs so they can “be popular with the ladies.” Meanwhile, their economics are a joke.
This reminds me of how all those fancy celebrities adopt children from third world countries to prove how morally superior they. Like celebrities have used these children as fashion accessories, people in our decaying society now do the same for their pets. Instead of treating them like living beings, they are merely fashion tools used to impress the servile masses. The narcissism in our culture is remarkable.
When people show their utmost patriotism by getting outfits like these for their dogs, you know something is wrong. Yet who doesn’t want to express their patriotism through their pets, after all? God Bless America.
As long as you know that you can find ice cream for dogs. And you may be wondering… what kind of dog needs specialized ice cream? I think people just want to brag about how they’ve discovered doggie ice cream. I think they just want to go to the doggie hotel to get their doggie a pedicure and then tweet about it. Yet when it really comes down to it, they will end up getting their doggie a facelift.
Perhaps doggie facelifts are a sign of things to come.
Rachel Haywire is an author and event producer who has been a model, electronic musician, and tech journalist. She currently runs the subversive political magazine triggerwarning.us. You can follow her on Twitter at @RachelHaywire.
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