Everyone Should Read the Wells Report Just for the Hilarious Text Messages

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Wed, May 6 - 4:29 pm EDT | 3 years ago by
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As you probably know, the Deflategate Wells report was released on Wednesday about the footballs used in the AFC Championship Game between the New England Patriots and the Indianapolis Colts. Part of the key findings state:

“We have concluded that it is more probable than not that Jim McNally (the Officials Locker Room attendant for the Patriots) and John Jastremski (an equipment assistant for the Patriots) participated in a deliberate effort to release air from Patriots game balls after the balls were examined by the referee.

Tom Brady was also implicated as knowing about it.

“Based on the evidence, it also is our view that it is more probable than not that Tom Brady (the quarterback for the Patriots) was at least generally aware of the inappropriate activities of McNally and Jastremski involving the release of air from Patriots game balls,” the report reads.

None of this comes as a surprise to much of anyone. And honestly, not that many people care about the official findings this long after the Super Bowl. But, everyone should read the entire Wells report only for the hilarity of the text messages.

Here’s just a little sampling below. My favorite line: “Tom sucks…im going make that next ball a fuckin balloon.”

Deflategate Text Messages

Deflategate Text Messages - Tom Sucks

For once, I agree with Shawne Merriman:


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