Ok, so this is a bit old, but it’s still amazing to watch. Also, I’ll be the first to say I have little to no knowledge about bicycle racing (isn’t there a big one in France every year? Yea, you need to have one ball to race in it or something?) and don’t quite understand who would make a living out of riding around in a giant circle. But you have to admit it takes a lot of cojones to get on a bike and ride around with a dozen other guys when this kind of accident is just around the corner turn. Yup, lots of cojones. Sore, flat cojones.

Post from: EveryJoe

Who’s up for a nice bike ride?

I’m sure most of you out there know that there’s a big soccer match coming up on Wednesday between Manchester United and Chelsea. It should be a thrilling event (I for one look forward to getting plastered in an Irish bar at 2 in the afternoon) and the people of Manchester are geared up and ready to go.

Not that this video is of a riot following the UEFA Cup, the Champions League ugly step-monster. It’s a tournament very similar to the Champions League, but with all the teams that weren’t good enough for Champions League. This doesn’t matter to soccer hooligans in England, though, because any soccer match — be it children’s league or scrub-pro league — is an open invitation to riot in the streets. Seriously I think it’s a law there or something.

Post from: EveryJoe

Manchester Residents Know How to Prepare for a Big Match

Some sad new for any Playstation 3 owners out there: Your console is a $600 piece of crap. No, seriously.

I remember back in college when my roommate bought a PS3 soon after it was released. He refused to buy a second controller or more than one game (both were too expensive, he said) and he instead chose to play Halo with me on my XBox 360 as his console collected dust. And now it’s become all too clear that is’ not my roommate’s cheapness that was wrong with his PS3, but Sony’s cheapness.

Now, almost a year later, we get demo footage for a Gran Tourismo 5 game that looks an awful lot like Gran Tourismo 3, which came out SEVEN YEARS AGO. I mean, sheesh, Sony. You can crash a car into a wall at 150 mph and all that happens is that the car bounces off? Get with the times already.

Post from: EveryJoe

Gran Turismo 5 Will Feature Invincible Car Technology

So the new hotness in video games is apparently going the way of the dying music industry. Word is EA Games is going to be using some controversial internet-required digital rights management on its new games. Now, I don’t know much about DRM, but I do know is that it sounds like a venereal disease and I know those burn and burning is bad.

Photo credit: Newscom

Post from: EveryJoe

EA Games Clearly Not Paying Attention to the Music Industry

Image details: Pacific Life Open Day 14 served by picapp.com

So the big news in the women’s tennis and golf world today is the retirement of Justine Henin and Annika Sorenstam, respectively. Much is to be made about how these great athletes are stepping down in their prime and blah blah blah have you seen Ana Ivanovic? Soooo Hot.

It’s a good thing for women’s tennis, too, because they’re going to need some fresh blood on the tour to replace Henin. It also helps that talent is, um, talented (or at least good looking). Ivanovich has got both those fields covered. Not only is she attractive, but she’s the top seed in the Italian Open. So great news tennis!

Wait, what’s that? She lost? Whatever, like I care about winning.

Post from: EveryJoe

Justine Henin and Annika Sorenstam Retire, End Careers in— OH MAN LOOK AT THAT HOTTIE!

Al touched on the creepiness of these NBA commercials not too long ago, but this one featuring Kevin Garnett and Lebron James caught my eye for a different reason. It’s that first line: “I remember seeing Bird win it all.” Let’s do the math, shall we? Bird and the Celtics won the NBA Championship in 1981, ‘84 and ‘86. KG was born in 1976, so it’s very possible that, at age 5, 8 or 10, he saw Bird win it all and decided then and there that he would do the same. Lebron…well that’s a different matter. As we all know, Lebron James is just 23 years old, born December 30, 1984. That would make him, oh, about a year and a half old when Bird won his last title.

So, with all due respect, I call bullshit. Oh, and idiocy. As in, the people who wrote this commercial are idiots and Lebron is an idiot for not piping up and saying, “Hey, I could barely walk when Bird won his last title, how bout we switch it to Jordan, or Hakeem, or, you know, anyone I actually remember watching?”

Or maybe I’ve lost the point entirely, who knows.

Post from: EveryJoe

Lebron James Watched Basketball from the Womb

Image details: Washington Redskins 2007 Headshots served by picapp.com

If you haven’t heard, Chris Cooley of the Washington Redskins has his own blog over with Yahoo! Sports. It’s highly entertaining if you want to know the thoughts of a pro football player or, say, if you want to know what it’s like to pee while another man stares intently at your penis (from the blog):

Once the selection process ends the player must wash his hands before the real fun begins. Who knows what someone could put all over his fingers to tamper with the results? The test taker then takes his shirt off and moves into the bathroom stall. At this point the pants must go down below the knees. In my case they usually fall closer to the ankles. I feel like a four year-old kid standing bare-assed in front of the stall while my dad coaches me on, making sure I don’t piss all over myself.

To me, the most surprising thing is how players have to report for a drug test within 24 hours of being selected, no matter where they are in the world. That, my friends, is insane. I mean, what if the player is in South Africa (a 24-hour flight from the East Coast)? Or what if you’re Hines Ward and you’re in South Korea? Does the NFL send someone on the 12+hour flight just to collect his pee?

The NFL…I WANT THAT!

Post from: EveryJoe

Chris Cooley and Men Looking at Men Peeing

I can’t decide if this guy has incredible brass or is incredibly stupid — or if the video is even real. I’m thinking/hoping it’s a fake because, not only does this guy remind me of how much of a gigantic wuss I am, but it also shows that surfers are way cooler than me. Also — again, this only applies if this movie is real — how ballsy is it to surf in shark infested waters, with or without three-pound stakes in tow?

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From the Stupid Idea Book: Shark Surfing

Yaowza! That is a fugly-ass rug, isn’t it? And what about those light fixtures? All that’s missing is the cork because this place is TACK CITY! Whoever lived here must’ve been blind and possibly insane. I mean, anyone who thinks this is a nice way to design a house must also think tattooing your face is a good idea.

Oh. Of course.

These are the pictures of Mike Tyson’s former house. As you can see, it’s been abandoned for quite some time. So long, in fact, that I’d think twice about jumping in that pool. Strike that, I wouldn’t think twice about it. I would never once think about it. That ish is gross.

(Photo courtesy of Wacky Archives. Credit: illicitohio.com)

Post from: EveryJoe

Mike Tyson’s House is Elaborate, Sparsely Furnished, Tacky

OK, so this isn’t really new — SportsCenter has included non-game plays in Top Plays for a while now — but I’ve always found it interesting when SportsCenter decided to place a non-competitive play in it’s Top Plays (not to mention shots of fans, championship parades and other things that can’t even be classified as “plays”). Regardless, this bank shot by Morris Peterson during Hornets practice yesterday morning is nothing short of incredible.

Full story can be found here and here (and I hear that writer is one handsome devil).

Post from: EveryJoe

Top Ten Plays Include Practice