Bill Belichick Won’t Discuss Absentee Brady

Tom Brady’s been gone, but Belichick’s remained mum. Other things Belichick won’t discuss:

- The ending of Cloverfield (Spoiler Alert!)

- Daddy issues

- Pride & Prejudice; no matter what the book club says, he won’t

- Discuses

- What exactly it is we’re doing here

- The Mitchell Report

- The elephant in the room

- The presence of Matt Cassell

- Ron Paul

- Tony Romo, Jessica Simpson, and — for some reason — Ashlee Simpson