Bird Crap Trauma Victims Unite

The ad:

“do you have any good traumatic stories involving birds? specifically being crapped on by a bird? funded art photo book project seeks your submissions! stories can range from 2 sentences to several paragraphs. “thanks in advance”

Oh the trauma. Oh the humanity. I was crapped on by a bird when I was a kid, and I still haven’t gotten over it. I’m so glad to know there are others out there like me. We need to start a support group for bird crap trauma victims. We can meet once a week and talk about how bad our cars look after parking them under trees, or how we went out for lunch and came back to work with poop on our shoulders. We need an organization. We need to show these birds whose boss!

This lovely art photo book featuring bird crap from around the city is just the remedy, I think.