Duncan’s Penalty Goes Beyond Suspension, Fines

The fallout continues for Yanks spikemaster Shelley Duncan. The fine and three-game suspension he received for the Yankees-Rays almost-fistfight was just the beginning.

See, just when you think every angle of a story has been covered, Frank Coffey and his eTrueSports Goodfellas prove once again that they dig deeper than any other news organization. (As for what they dig—who are we to judge?)

New York - Bob Watson, MLB’s dean of discipline, has handed Shelley Duncan an additional punishment resulting from last week’s Yankee-Tampa Rays flareup, ordering the Yankee first baseman to write, “I will not slide into second base with my spikes high,” 500 times on college-ruled paper.

“Bummer,” said a subdued Duncan.

Rays manager, Joe Maddon, all ready incensed at the lightness of Duncan’s three-game suspension, erupted again at this new penalty. ”He pulls a punk-ass stunt and this is all he gets? Anybody can write!”

Hours after the Watson ruling, sources close to eTrueSports reported a Duncan sighting at a Staples office supply store in Bradenton, FL not far from the Yankee’s Tampa spring training base where he was observed purchasing a box of No. 2 lead pencils and three yellow legal pads.

“He was wearing a black Fedora and a trenchcoat,” said the source. “But the flip flops gave him away, Shelley loves flip flops.”

Our take? It could have been worse. He could have been forced to write “I will not act out S & M fantasies on the baseball field.”