Earth Hour Calamity: Driving in the Dark

GROVERS MILL, NJ — There are reports from Tonga of drivers turning off their lights during Earth Hour.

Eyewitnesses were unable to give accurate estimates of how many vehicles may have been involved in a massive pile-up at the Pacific island country’s traffic light, which was also turned off.

“It’s too dark! I can’t tell you how many cars are involved in the crash,” said one bystander, who added that the number can’t exceed the number of vehicles on the island. (See citizen journalist photo of the night-time scene below.)

As Earth Hour extends into other time zones, organizers are frantically working on an emergency plan, with instructions for motorists and pedestrians in other countries.

“We are going to grant amnesty for any cities that decide not to turn out their lights in tunnels, viaducts and underground parking garages,” announced Meg Piercings, director of Earth Hour USA. “We have a command post set up, and will announce additional amnesties for earth-unfriendly activities that will be tolerated in the interests of public safety.”

Rumors are circulating that the World Wildlife Fund may grant special permission to hospital emergency rooms and operating rooms to keep their lights on during Earth Hour.

Australian officials could not be reached for comment. There are hopes that communications with Australia resume if and when the country’s infrastructure recovers from Earth Hour.

African and European leaders are recommending that people stay off roadways, avoid air travel and use very large candles if travelling by boat. The black-out begins at 8 p.m. March 29 and lasts for one hour, unless a country’s electrical system is destroyed by workers stumbling around in the dark during this period. In that case, lights may be out longer.

Other Earth Hour News:

• Tibet, Guantanamo, Spuzzum
• Earth Hour Survival Guide

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