Hazards of Online Dating
November 9, 2009 by James Timmons
Filed under Sex & Dating
I know several couples who have met online and lived happily ever after. But don’t get it twisted — this is not the norm. These days, it seems everyone has an online dating horror story or two. I think that is because of how it all begins … with a picture and a few lies.
In a traditional dating scenario, you normally see your potential partner before deciding to go out on a date. And though looks aren’t everything, they are a big factor. Physical attraction must exist in some sense if a relationship has a chance to survive.
With online dating, it normal starts with a photo… and not just any photo. A photo at just the right angle with just the right amount of Photoshop enhancements. Double-chins can be blended away with a mouse. Push-up bras and the right camera angle can do wonders.
And with online dating, the photo is just the beginning of the lies. Online, a person can be whoever they want to be. A college student with a part-time job becomes an “ambitious entrepreneur.” A woman carrying a few extra pounds become “beautifully curvaceous.”
With online dating, more often that not, what you see is NOT what you get. If you do venture into dating online, try to avoid the pitfalls.
Request a few photos
Once you start corresponding via email, request a few photos outside of the profile photos. If the person makes excuses like “I don’t have any other photos online,” you know you are in trouble.
Talk on the phone
It’s easier to lie about yourself online than it is to on the phone. Have a few lengthy phone calls before venturing out on a date.
Meet in a public place
For everyone’s safety, it’s best to meet in a public place during the daytime. Meeting for lunch during the workweek is a good choice — the date can’t go too long because you have to get back to the office.
Don’t reveal too much
During your correspondence and initial meeting, don’t reveal too much personal information such as your home address or place of work. Once you are comfortable enough, you can start to open up.
Image: istockphoto
