Hillary Addresses Democratic Convention
Dresses Like Halloween Pumpkin, Warns Dems She’ll Be Back To Haunt Party Year After Year With Same Tired Shtick
Hillary Clinton gave the speech of her life (at least until the next speech of her life) last night, holding Democratic conventioneers in awe as they watched her repeatedly take credit for single-handedly creating cracks in the glass ceiling that was keeping a group of women everywhere from reaching their full potential.
“I feel like, ever since Hillary’s ground-breaking candidacy, I’m no longer limited to just making minimum wage and 15% tips,” said waitress Carrie Datwaite. “Now, I just know I can get my tips up to around 18%. Unless, of course, it’s Hillary’s who’s tipping…”
Millions of women, for whom Oprah Winfrey, Carly Fiorina, Condoleeza Rice, Anne Mulcahy, Nancy Pelosi, Patricia Russo, Margaret Whitman, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Safra Catz, Amy Pascal, Sandra Day O’Connor, Janet Robinson, Dawn Hudson, Katie Couric, Beth Brooke and Christiane Amanpour weren’t enough inspiration now feel more empowered than earlier in the year, thanks to Hillary!
Apparently, so do a lot of men since the 18 million number Hillary dwells on presumably also includes some of the oppressor sex who’ve been Windexing the glass ceiling all these years.
Or maybe Ms. Clinton is just bad at math.
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Part of 18 million crackpots in the glass ceiling…
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