How to Break Up With a Woman

I once came to a point with a girlfriend that I knew we were headed down different paths. She was off to Europe for a study-abroad program and I had been searching for reasons to keep dating for quite some time. The looming distance was a catalyst for me to end things. Since I had no desire to see most of my belongings scattered on the front lawn or burning in a pile, I realized that tact was going to have to be a key element in the break-up.

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Gentlemen, if you realize that your relationship ‘just isn’t meant to be’, be careful. Working at the same business, having friends in common, or the key to your apartment still being in her possession should be motivating factors in ending on a high note.

Be honest. Lay your reasons out on the table. By allowing her to see that you hold out no hope and do not wish to work towards a resolution, she will have to accept your decision.

Use clichés. Lie with a purpose. She isn’t going to buy your “it’s not you, it’s me” claim but it will allow her some sense of peace.

Take responsibility. Admit your mistakes. Let her see that you know what behaviors get on her nerves but make it clear; you are not willing to change.

Apologize. Every breakup is difficult and will cause some pain. Most often, women claim that they need closure but what they really want is an apology. You telling her that you are sorry for how the situation played out will smooth the transition over.

Be firm. Don’t let her insist that things will get better. Don’t let her promise to change. Don’t let her say or do anything to sway you from your decision.

You have to think it through when you end a relationship. And for God’s sake, don’t sleep with her again! You need to keep your nose clean for a while. This means no dating anyone else or making negative comments about the ex. I can’t guarantee that she won’t get upset and say some nasty things but taking the high road works out better for you in the end. Some of my former lovers and I were able to build friendships out of the ashes of a relationship and I’ve valued that.

Having women in your life that know you, in the biblical sense, can be awkward for a time but, when that passes; things can morph into something so much better. You both will have the freedom to move on and find that person who fulfills your fantasy.

No one should ever compromise their own happiness because they are too scared to make a change. Too often, men stay in doomed relationships because they lack the courage to get out, even when they know that it isn’t meant to be. In my experience, telling my girlfriend that I couldn’t wait for her was the best decision for the both of us. Or at least, I hope so.