Just The Tip
Obama Administration Promises To Pull Out In Time
Responding to concerns that they planned to nationalize two of the nation’s largest banks, Bank of America and Citibank, Obama spokesman Robert Gibbs insisted those kinds of thoughts were the furthest thing from the Adminstration’s mind.
“This administration continues to strongly believe that a privately held banking system is the correct way to go, ensuring that they are regulated sufficiently by this government,” said Gibbs.
“We just want to take the banks to a movie and maybe go out to Starbucks afterward,” Gibbs added. “We guarantee we’ll respect the banks in the morning and we really just want to spend more time with them because of their financial intelligence and to get to know them better.”
When asked specifically about nationalization, Gibbs maintained, “We promise we won’t come … uh, to that.”
Reporters covering the press conference noted Gibbs did have a TARP program in his wallet, just in case the government got lucky and was able to force seduce the banks into giving in to demands for more control.
Bank of America President Ken Lewis said, “It’s really not a big deal. The government is a good provider most of the time and it always give us money when we need it. Sure, sometimes they’ll slap us around a bit, but most of the time it’s because of something we did and we probably deserved it.”
Other members of the business community, worried about where the bank’s relationship with the government was headed, urged Lewis to get away from the government and seek professional counseling but appeared resigned to the fact that Lewis was unlikely to heed their advice.
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Bank maintains the government really loves them…
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Photo credit: Everystockphoto.com
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