Networking Crisis, Solved: How to Deal With the Post-Introduction Awkward Silence

In the comments on my post on networking tips last week, Ren asked how to deal with the inevitable lull in conversation after the initial introduction in a networking situation.

Ren Garcia
May 7, 2008 at 11:00 pm

Great pick-up lines, Kristen. Could lead to something heavier than networking.

My problem is the dead silence that comes after the entree. I always end up making up an excuse for a graceful exit.

Based on the tips we’ve already talked about, I’ll work with the assumption that you’ve got the "Hi, what’s your name? What do you do?" part covered. (If not, you should review.) But then what? Never fear — you have lots of options.

Choice #1: Break the ice with some honesty. "Ahh, don’t you just love those awkward silences at these things?" This may not work in every situation — it kind of depends on the other person — but when you say what the other person is thinking, it puts them at ease.

Choice #2: Put the ball back in their court. "So, what brings you here today?" People love to talk about themselves.

Choice #3: Pay them a compliment. "That’s a great belt/purse/business card/whatever. May I ask where you found it?" Be genuine, and make your new friend feel good.

Choice #4: Ask them a question about the organization or gathering. "This is my first time at Networking Doesn’t Have to Suck. Is there anyone you think I should meet while we’re here tonight?"

Choice #5: Ask them a question about the specific presentation you’ve seen or are about to see. "Have/had you attended a talk about making networking less sucky? What did you think about tonight? / What are you interested in about tonight’s talk?"

Choice #6: Ask them open-ended questions about their business. "I’ve never met a fill-in-the-blank before. How did you get into that field? What is your favorite part of fill-in-the-blank?"

Choice #7: Them how you think you might be able to help them. "You know, I have a colleague who’s looking for someone to do-what-you-do. Do you have a business card on you?" Important: Only use this one if you actually do know someone to whom you could make the referral.

There are dozens of other possibilities, but I don’t want to stifle your creativity by going on about this for ages. So now I’M going to put the ball in YOUR court (see #2). Was this helpful? Which of these ideas strikes you as something you could do? What ideas do you have? Leave a comment and let me know what’s on your mind.

Contents © Copyright 2008 Kristen King

Tags: women in business, women and business, women, woman, business, networking, awkward silence, uncomfortable, how to network, how to make conversation, how to make small talk, biz chicks rule, kristen king