News From the Inevitable Future: The Real LeBrons

June, 2027 – Cleveland, OH

LeBron James finally won his first, elusive NBA title. James and the Cavaliers had been to finals many times since their first trip in 2007, but had failed to emerge victorious every time. LeBron’s poor supporting cast was often, and rightfully, the scapegoat. This year, LeBron finally got the teammates he deserved, and an NBA title followed. Point guard LeBron James Jr. was an All-NBA Second Teamer, while power forward Bryce Maximus James was named to the All-Defensive Team. Center Julius James improved significantly, becoming a serviceable offensive option with stellar defense. Rookie-of-the-year shooting guard Jordan James was the last bit of firepower that the Cavaliers needed to become champions. LeBron James Sr. has announced his retirement. He says he wants to simply watch his sons play and get the hell away from Damon Jones.