Oh Wait, Screw Commando: Steel Disaster
I mean, I’m not about to stop you if you buy it, but Mr Parish will not be held responsible for your loss of money or equilibrium. Commando: Steel Disaster, which previously looked like a cute shooter, still looks like a cute shooter. But looks can be deceiving, friend.
“See, it’s funny that it’s called Steel Disaster, because it’s both stolen and a disaster.” – Nich Maragos
Reportedly, Commando: Steel Disaster lifts a lot from its adoptive daddy, Metal Slug. You shoot shoot shoot and the bad guys shoot shoot shoot and whoever remains standing is the winner—until the next bad guy materalises. Repeat several hundred times. But unlike Metal Slug, Commando: Steel Disaster omitted balanced gameplay. Oops.
From GameSpite:
“Commando makes a crucial mistake that SNK never did: its levels are endless. They seriously go on and on, and you have a single life to make it through them before you can continue. I tried several times and couldn’t even make it through the first mission. I think maybe I was close to the end, but there’s no way to tell. You die, you’re booted back to the title screen. No checkpoints, no second chances, just ten minutes of marathon shooting — all lost to a couple of unlucky hits.”
Well, I guess we all dodged a bullet—or several thousand in this case. It’s not like there’s going to be a lack of titles for the Nintendo DS this holiday season, but I still feel a bit bad for Commando: Steel Disaster. I’ll have to look it up when I get to the white elephant portion of my Christmas List.
(Also, never trust anything Parish says. Ever. If you see him running away and screaming about a tidal wave? You just plant your ass right there and cross your arms and say, “No sir, I will not be fooled AAAAARGHEGARGLEGARGLE—” ::Drown::)
