“Screech” to Wrestle: AKA Hulk Hogan’s Definition of Celebrity

Certain reality TV shows are like those haunted house rides at the carnival: They seem like harmless fun on the outside but once you’re in, you’re ashamed at having fallen for hype and stupidity, so you can’t wait for it to end.

Hulk Hogan’s Celebrity Championship Wrestling series, with a cast like this, has a good shot at becoming one of those shows.

The Zoner gave us the heads-up on this and at first we thought it was too bad to be true. Alas, it’s as real as Paris Hilton’s dark roots when she came out of the pokey.

Note the could-it-be-any-looser definition of “celebrity” employed here: Dennis Rodman. Todd Bridges. Dustin Diamond (“Screech” from Saved By the Bell). We repeat: Dustin Diamond.

Does this look like someone you’d want to shake hands with, much less wrestle?

Image: Used with permission of www.splashnewsonline.com  

This whole business raises a multitude of questions, two of the most pertinent Dustin Diamond ones being:

1) Why didn’t security at the 15 Minutes of Fame Institute take away his re-entry badge when he left the first time?

2) We know this is two-year-old news, but we still can’t understand why anyone would ever want to get frisky with him, never mind on videotape?

Hulk Hogan, we thank you for the blog foddah-to-be. We knew you wouldn’t stay mad at us for posting that creepy photo of you applying sunscreen to daughter Brooke.