Six Flags Adds New Thrill Ride
New Yahoo! Ride Will Have You Screaming, Even If You Don’t Own Stock in Internet Company
Six Flags announced today they will be adding a new ride to their theme parks just in time for the summer season. The new roller coaster, called Yahoo!, will start by plunging riders from 33.63 meters off the ground down to a mere 19.05 meters.
A new carny will jump in at that point and Six Flag attendees will rocket skyward, nearly 70% above the low point of the ride. Then, after some heated discussion, the original Six Flags worker will re-take control of the ride and thrill seekers will be slowly guided back down to the ride’s low point … if they haven’t already jumped off.
Six Flags officials have reported an unusually high number of disgruntled riders, many of whom indicated that they felt the Yahoo! ride promised more than it delivered.
In other news, shareholders of the ride’s namesake have indicated they will press for a company name change at the next stockholder’s meeting, looking to change the name of the company from Yahoo! to Whoop-de-damn-doo.
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Rollercoaster … say, what?
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