The REAL Reason the Patriots Lost

Given as we are to deep thoughts, we need to make sense out of the darkest of sports moments we experience as sports fans. (Let’s say, for example, the New England Patriots playing their worst game in years and losing the Super Bowl to the New York Giants, who weren’t that much sharper until the very end).

We had a chat with reader Prospero after the debacle game. Analyst caps firmly in place, we were able to narrow down the Pats’ fatal flaw. It wasn’t Bill Belichick, or the defense that should have stopped the Giants on that last drive. It wasn’t even Tom Brady, who played like a second- or third-string quarterback instead of one making his fourth trip to the Super Bowl after a record-setting season. No.

It was none other than Gisele Bundchen.

Think about it. The Brazilian supermodel (also known as The Umlaut) has supposedly attended boyfriend Tom Brady’s games at Gillette Stadium. But: She wasn’t his gal pal last time he played in the Super Bowl, so this was her first trip to the Pigskin Pinata Fest.

And who’s to say she didn’t spend some quality time with Tony Romo squeeze Jessica Simpson in the past couple of weeks? That bad luck charm aura might be catchy.

Maybe Brady should reconsider the offer from Ines Gomez-Mont, the reporter who proposed to him . . .