Time for a song

There’s been plenty happening in the cricket news recently, plenty I could blog about, plenty of scope for pontification, easy fodder for a bit of freestyle sledging. Selection issues, injuries, even the Ovalgate scandal is still going strong. Loads of it. But the trouble is, I can’t. I’m losing it. I am literally a nervous wreck. And no it has nothing to do with an extended drinking session on Saturday afternoon, whilst enjoying England’s victory over South Africa in the rugby. (Well, maybe it does a little.)

Nope, it’s quite simple. We’re in to the final countdown (2 points for whomever thought instinctively of Berlin, and a bonus point if you remember the Peugeot 405 adverts). Less than 4 days. Given that the Aussies are hours ahead of us, it’s now about 60 hours and counting. There’s really only song to sing in this situation. No, not Kajagoogoo. It is of course the Pointer Sisters. Come on. Sing along.

I’m so excited and I just can’t hide it
I’m about to lose control and I think I like it
I’m so excited and I just can’t hide it

Now, I know if you read the full lyrics, they really don’t make much sense in the context of the Ashes. One could extrapolate that “I know I know I know I know I want you” might refer to that little Urn. But then I don’t know why I’d want to wrap myself around it, and squeeze it and so forth.

That’s what the Ashes have done to me. Literally turned me (and most cricket fans worldwide) into illiterate gibbering morons (and I’m not even referring to those nobheads who abused Monty the other day).

Bring it on, I say. Even if I will be cowering behind my sofa in nervous anticipation in a pool of my own sweat.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to hurl.