Top 10 Dumbest college sports mascots

The collegiate basketball landscape is filled with tradition, pageantry, school spirit and folklore. There are unforgettable plays, legendary players and coaches, dramatic wins and heartbreaking losses.

Oh, and one more thing – mascots. Lots of mascots. Big ones. Small ones. Clever ones. Ridiculous ones.

So, in honor of those mascots that are either ridiculous, stupid, boring, or absurd, I present to you my Top 10 list of the Dumbest college sports mascots.

#1 – Sammy the Banana Slug: University of California at Santa Cruz Banana Slugs – not only do the fine folks at UCSC have one of the dumbest team names around (Banana Slug), their mascot, Sammy, looks like a cross between Jabba the Hut and Steve Urkel from Family Matters. That is one fierce looking slug, folks…

#2 – YoUDee : University of Delaware Blue Hens – First off, yes, YoUDee is a clever way to name your character after the school’s name, the University of Delaware. It is also a stupid way. Second, YoUDee’s costume is horrible – he has a tan jersey that goes over his blue torso and arms, which makes sense. But then he has a blue skirt that goes over his tan legs. So, is he blue or tan? Let’s show a little consistency here, shall we? And please, please, please don’t even get me started on the fact that UD chose a hen as their mascot. That’s the best mascot they could come up with? A small, scrawy little bird? And a blue one at that? What, was another school already using Cornish Game Hen as their mascot? Was Grouse already taken? (photo courtesy of www.udel.edu)

#3 – The Tree: Stanford University Cardinal – Stanford has no official mascot…perhaps because they are so embarrassed by their unofficial one, The Tree. This is a googly-eyed, bow-tie wearing, top-hat sporting, cheesy-grinning tree. With horribly fake leaves. Their nickname, the Cardinal, refers to the color and not the bird or the clergyman. Fair enough. So why didn’t they choose a mascot that actually related to their nickname? You know, like a swatch of cardinal-colored fabric or something. Let me repeat myself so that everybody is clear – Stanford’s mascot mascot is a TREE.

#4 – The Fantom of the Dome: University of California at Santa Barbara Gauchos – the Gauchos had a pretty cool looking mascot for a while, until it was retired. To take the Gaucho’s place, in came The Fantom of the Dome (cute play on words, once again) with his ridiculous Zorro mask, black gloves and black cape. Somewhere on the UCSB campus, there is a guy (most likely a Computer Science or Finance major) who really needs to get a life. Either that, or some serious psychiatric help. Or perhaps a little bit of both.

#5 – Jonathan the Husky: University of Connecticut Huskies – Jonathan XII, the real-life Husky, is pretty cool. I have a problem with the costumed version of Jonathan. He looks more like a teddy bear than a husky. He isn’t fierce or ferocious. He’s timid and cuddly. He doesn’t inspire me to scream and shout for my team, he makes me want to curl up in front of a fireplace with a cup of hot cocoa. (Photo courtesy of Megan Reynolds – The Daily Campus)

#6 -Scrappy, the Mockingbird – University of Tennessee-Chattanooga Mocs – OK, let’s get this straight…the team’s nickname is the Mocs (it was Moccasins until 1996), and yet its mascot isn’t a moccasin – it is a mockingbird named Scrappy. There’s no point in using a moccasin as your mascot if your team name is moccasin, is there? And, to top it all off, UTC’s main logo has Scrappy riding a train (in reference to the Chattanooga Choo Choo). I’m getting a headache…

#7 – Otto the Orangeman: Syracuse University Orange – I guess you only have so many ways you can go in choosing a school mascot when your nickname is the “Orange”. I personally like my oranges firm – Otto is just too squishy for me.

Plus, the name – Otto – sounds very nerdy to me. With so many better “O” names out (Octavio, Obi Wan, and Odysseus, just to name a few), you’ve got to do better than Otto. and then, of course, there is the skirt that he’s wearing in the picture…(not that there’s anything wrong with that). (photo courtesy of www.suathletics.com)

#8 – Testudo the Terrapin: University of Maryland Terrapins – aren’t Diamondback turtles slow, plodding and unexciting? That’s what I thought. You can dress up your mascot name all you want, you can call yourselves Terrapins all you want. The fact remains, your mascot is a turtle.

A slow, boring, dull turtle.

A turtle.

And what kind of name is Testudo? It sounds like a villain from Marvel Comics that is going to battle Superman. (photo courtesy of umterps.cstv.com)

#9 – Herbie Husker: University of Nebraska Cornhuskers – one of the dominant college football programs in the country…the famed Black Shirts defense…Tom Osborne…multiple national championships…and you have a mascot named Herbie? He looks like Woody from Toy Story on HGH. In the photo, he’s the one on the right. His sidekick, Lil’ Red, would have been in the Top 10 as well, but he isn’t the primary mascot. (Photo courtesy of www.huskers.com)

#10 – Pounce the Panther: University of Wisconsin – Milwaukee Panthers – thankfully, UWM retired their old mascot, Victor E. Panther, and replaced it with Pounce. Unfortunately, Pounce isn’t much better. The yellow and black pinstripes have got to go, and Pounce’s bright yellow eyebrows are hideous. Back to the drawing board, boys. (photo courtesy of uwmpanthers.cstv.com)