Will the NFL Cave to the Grandpa Simpson Lobby?

Because anything can be related to something from the Simpsons, immediately upon hearing that the NFL was considering banning long hair, I thought of how that would probably please Grandpa Simpson. “Look at them sideburns! He looks like a girl. Now, Johnny Unitas — there’s a haircut you could set your watch to.” The rule was proposed by the Kansas City Chiefs, whose Larry Johnson once tackled Troy Polamalu by his hair. Why exactly the Chiefs proposed this rule is unclear, but the most significant consequence is expected to be that I will no longer be constantly confused by the Green Bay defensive backfield.