It all makes sense now. Hulk Hogan’s affair with Brooke’s erstwhile pal Christiane Plante, 17-year-old Nick Hogan’s time in the clink, mom/cougar Linda’s 19-year-old boy toy (also Brooke’s friend), and maybe even the squicky Daddy-rubs-lotion photos.
Yes, all the Hogan family drama was sketched out by the Man Upstairs. According to Brooke’s remarks via People.com, the Big Guy nixed the first draft of the Hogan Family Portrait and revised the blueprint to make a family that works.
Something like that.
Brooke also claims there’s been some symbolic role-swapping, as the 20-year-old feels like she’s now a parent to her 48-year-old mother. (Hey, with …read more

See Brooke Hogan.
See Brooke Hogan braving on despite her parents’ respective fetishes with her pals.
See Brooke Hogan Run Wild, per Maxim.
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Usually when parents get to know the friends of their teen or twentysomething children, it’s with the hope that said friend is a trustworthy pal and a positive influence. But in Brooke Hogan’s family, Meet the Parents sometimes translates as Meet Your Next Screw Toy.
*Pauses to allow readers time for shuddering in horror*
First up is in-need-of-a-vocabulary-brush-up Hulk Hogan, who hopped in the sack with Brooke’s (uh, former) friend Christiane Plante. 
And now Mom Linda Hogan is getting busy with Brooke’s 19-year-old buddy, Charlie Hill.

 Brooke Hogan staring off into the distance, perhaps wondering where she went wrong raising her parents.
Image: Used with permission of www.splashnewslonline.com
We …read more

Certain reality TV shows are like those haunted house rides at the carnival: They seem like harmless fun on the outside but once you’re in, you’re ashamed at having fallen for hype and stupidity, so you can’t wait for it to end.
Hulk Hogan’s Celebrity Championship Wrestling series, with a cast like this, has a good shot at becoming one of those shows.
The Zoner gave us the heads-up on this and at first we thought it was too bad to be true. Alas, it’s as real as Paris Hilton’s dark roots when she came out of the pokey.
Note the could-it-be-any-looser definition of …read more

Perez Hilton has a photo of Hulk Hogan applying suntan lotion on his bathing suit-clad daughter, Brooke Hogan, poolside at a Los Angeles hotel. After careful analysis of our reader demographics, we concluded that you should click on the link below only if one or more of the following applies:
A) You want a peek at Brooke in a bikini and face down (sorry!) on a lounge chair.
B) You want to assess the Hulk’s lotion-application abilities because it fulfills some kind of weirdo fantasy you have. (Don’t laugh—at least one person falls into that category. Remember the affair he had with Brooke’s former friend …read more

So readers, riddle us this: If you were the “other woman” in an affair with a past-his-prime celebrity and the National Enquirer besmirched your once-good name, would you:
(a) Go on 60 Minutes and tell Mike Wallace your side of the story;
(b) Go on The View and make Barbara Walters squirm when you tell your side of the story; or
(c) Write a letter to celebrity gossip site Perez Hilton and tell your side of the story?
Christiane Plante, former um, bodyslamming partner of Hulk Hogan, chose option C. While she ‘fesses up to the affair, she insists she’s sorry—after the fact, like everyone …read more