Just this week we had The Rocket’s 5-hour congressional hearing; gauze-wielding, syringe-saving Brian McNamee’s testimony; and McNamee’s claim that Debbie Clemens had an intimate encounter with an HGH injection. And now we have Penn professors joining the all-star cast.

Last month, Clemens’ agent Randy Hendricks issued an 18,000-word statistical report claiming the pitcher’s late-career standout stats were due to “adjustments.”

The professors say, “Nice try, but . . . um, no. We don’t think so.”

Their rationale reminds us of all those statistics classes we’re trying to forget. (Hey, we need to free up brain cells for important things like sports gossip, cartoons, and GameBoy). Let’s just say the profs attribute it to something like fuzzy math and a general sense of “somethin’ just ain’t right”:

Our reading is that the available data on Clemens’ career strongly hint that some unusual factors may have been at play in producing his excellent late-career statistics.

They don’t take a stab at what those “unusual factors” might be, but give it long enough and some biochemists will make a special guest appearance on The Roger Clemens Show, too.

Post from: EveryJoe

Fuzzy Math for Clemens?

In one corner, you have the Roger Clemens-Brian McNamee edition of Days of Our Lives. Adding to the overall “WTF?”-ness of the whole steroid shebang is the latest McNamee bombshell that he also injected the 7-time Cy Young winner’s wife Debbie Clemens with HGH.

But in another corner, thankfully, you have the Beckhams. They’re not embroiled in a steroid abuse scandal, they’re not licking their Super Bowl wounds as we imagine Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen are, and they aren’t having a pre-Pro Bowl PDA-fest in Hawaii like Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson. They’re just being their sexy selves.

And the world shows its gratitude: David just got a World’s Sexiest Footballer* title while Victoria “Posh Spice” got a World’s Sexiest Mom nod from Victoria’s Secret (and if they say something’s sexy, we believe ‘em) as well as a coveted Project Runway guest judge spot.

Now of course, it would be much more fun to cover the Beckhams if they did something naughty (publicly), but sometimes it’s just nice to enjoy the pretty people as they are.

*Um, obviously this doesn’t refer to American Football, or it would have been a tie with Tom Brady.

Post from: EveryJoe

Thank Goodness for the Beckhams

McNamee claims that Mrs. Clemens, looking pretty darn buff here in a 2003 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, had HGH injected while preparing for the salacious shoot.

As faithful reader Prospero aptly pointed out, sometimes the Blog Deities really are generous in doling out foddah. But who knew they worked late on Fridays?

Post from: EveryJoe

Et Tu, Mrs. Clemens?