– New Pay-For-Content Site Is Modeled After Donner Party Pioneers – Beginning this week, Newsday, the Long Island newspaper New York city commuters choose as a last resort for something to read on the way to work in the event … More
– Wal-Mart Fires ‘Asset Protection Officer’ For Chasing Down Shoplifter — Josh Rutner was a unique Wal-Mart employee. He took his job seriously. Josh was tasked with being an “asset protection officer” for the gigantic retailer. So, when a customer … More
– Blog Action Day 2009 Mobilizes Bloggers In Biggest Waste Of Online Time Since Computer Solitaire – Has there ever been a more ridiculous time sink than the amount of money, press coverage and trampling of individual choice associated with … More
–Stories Ripped-Off From The Day’s Headlines – —- Russia Refuses To Back Iran Embargo Putin Says Sanctions Don’t Work … Better To Use Poison “Trust me, Iranians love sushi….” . ——————————————————————— Pepsi iPhone App Offers Guys Pick-Up Lines, Chance To … More
– Board of Directors Caves to Gov’t Pressure to Limit Pay, Require All Citigroup Execs To Wear Frilly Lace Thongs To Work – Under government pressure Citigroup agreed to sell off one of it’s profitable business units so it could … More
– Ability To Check Your Overdrawn Bank Balance In Men’s Room Is Latest Useless App Waiting To Be Hacked – Ooooh. Have you got the latest, coolest app that lets you check your bank balance anytime from your cell phone? … More
– In Similar News, People Who Can’t Throw Have Hard Time Making Professional Baseball Teams – The folks at MSNBC are all over this breaking employment trend: If you don’t have computer skills, you may have a more difficult time … More
– U.S. City Was First City Eliminated From Contention As Europeans Diss Obama, Support Polanski – The International Olympic Committee didn’t even make the pretense of giving Chicago serious consideration for the Olympics as the city was eliminated in the … More
– Gargantuan Agency Would Help Gov’t Achieve Economies of Scale in Inefficiency, Corruption – Senator Chris Dodd (D-CT-Sweet Housing Deal) wants to create a super-regulator for banks in an effort to focus government inefficiencies and corruption in one huge agency. … More
– …And He’ll Think Of A Hundred Reasons Why You Should Keep Giving Him Fish, And Could You Make That Sea Bass If It’s Not Too Much Trouble? – Why is it every government forecast is like a drunken bar … More
–Stories Ripped-Off From The Day’s Headlines – Automakers To Lose Stars In New Crash Tests Kanye West, Entire Cast of ‘Entourage’ Lead In Poll By Voters To Elect New Crash Test Dummies “Yo, I’mma let you finish running into that … More
– Global Temps Rise .000001 Degree As Group Expels Concentrations of CO-2 During Big Finale of Sing-A-Long – A group of world celebrities gathered in Geneva, Switzerland yesterday to protest global warming because celebrities never gather in a place like … More
– Nicholas II Said To Be Unavailable Due To Being Dead – Congressman Patrick McHenry (R-N.C.; see also: “Give me McLiberty or give me McDeath.”) wants all government czars to testify in front of Congress. Because testifying in front of … More
– Stories Ripped Off From Today’s News – NFL Star Accused Of Choking MTV’s Tila Tequila Assault Marks First Time Player Tried to Perform Community Service Before Being Sentenced On next play, cops pick up blitzing linebacker —————————————————- Thousands Of … More
