Sigh. It’s quite unfortunate, however, that like most speed runs, this speed run of Shang Tsung on Mortal Kombat 2 is tool assisted and played on an emulator. Ahh, but what the heck. It’s still fun watching a character beat up all his opponents from start to finish.

Next time, I’d like to see the player do it without the tool assist. :p

Post from: EveryJoe

Speed Run: Mortal Kombat 2 on Sega

Look, ma, no hands! It’s strange seeing Pac-Man land blows on the diminutive Mario without flailing arms and legs. It must be his, er, its big mouth.

Post from: EveryJoe

Pac-Man pwns Mario

Oh, for those wondering what Mugen is, here’s a brief description:

Mugen is a freeware 2D fighting game engine designed by Elecbyte, written in C with the Allegro library. The engine was originally released in July 1999. Beta versions of it were made to work on DOS, Linux and Windows platforms, distributed through their website. The engine allows users to insert created characters, background stages, and other game objects through interpreted text files, graphics, and sound compilations to create a functioning fighting game similar to commercial games.

Post from: EveryJoe

Mario versus Sonic on Mugen

Oh, I used to enjoy playing it, back when I was, what, 10 years old. I thought I could rekindle the flame by watching a video of Swashbuckler, but no go, unlike other Apple II video games.

The problem: Swashbuckler grew old pretty quickly. Check out this entry in Wikipedia about the reception of the game (emphasis in bold face mine):

Computer Gaming World gave Swashbuckler a glowing review, only lamenting the rollover of the five-digit score at 250 (which was fixed prior to final publication), appended by an editor’s note that, although the graphics were superb and the concept somewhat unique, the players at CGW grew tired of the lack of variety after a few dozen kills.

Not convinced it’s a bad game? If you can sit down in front of the PC for the entire length of the video, Paul might give you a cookie.

Post from: EveryJoe

Swashbuckler: I don’t know why I even played this game

Well, here’s the video. Hope you get something out of it (if you still play Mortal Kombat, that is):

Post from: EveryJoe

Mortal Kombat: Make your opponent bleed with these moves

Although I laud KIG666’s effort at trashing his opponent with an 80-hit ultimate combo, I have to say that the way he executed the combo was rather, uhmm, dull. It’s repetitive, and nothing reeks mundane more than a repetition of moves. Unfortunately, the limitation on executable moves is the software’s fault, I’m sure.

To highlight my point, here’s a video of Killer Instinct’s Jago dealing the same amount of punishment with an 80-hit ultra combo. Yes, it’s still repetitive, but notice how the player changes tact at the end.

Now, if only I could do that. Haha.

Post from: EveryJoe

Killer Instinct: Bumpers end Saberwulf’s agony

Whew! Makes me wanna bring out the Super Nintendo Entertainment System and the Nintendo Family Computer again and play all the classics shown in the video … at least, until I reach the stage where the bosses are hiding. *wink, wink*

Post from: EveryJoe

Boss battles: Truly inspiring

For now, though, let me focus on Diablo and its expansion Hellfire. These two are probably two of the most played games on my old Pentium 200MMX. Yeah, not Pentium 4, not even 3 or 2, but just plain Pentium, and I owned two of them back in the late 1990s to early 2000s. Why Diablo? Well, for starters, it’s the only game, aside from Dungeon Keeper that is, the runs on the bucket of bolts. Fortunately, it was enough to keep me busy during boring nights without my stalkers bothering me on the telephone.

Anyway, I found out soon after installing it on the, yes, Pentium 200MMX that the game was short. So I got a copy of Hellfire and slapped it on Diablo. I don’t remember much from the time I spent, however long it may have been, playing Diablo: Hellfire except the fact that I loved wearing cow armor.

Cow armor? Yeah, it’s called the Bovine Plate and it was the best (at least for me) armor available back then. Consider the following stats: Armor Class 150, Indestructible, +50% Light Radius, Resist All +30%, and -5 Damage from Enemies. It’s only drawback is the reduction of spell level by 1. Sigh. Those were the days.

Post from: EveryJoe

Diablo III: And the heavens shall tremble

You would think Birmingham was violent enuff but YOU WOULD BE WRONG ETC. Let me give the backstory to the duel that was more exciting than Stephen Spielberg’s seminal fillum DUEL.

Friday was the day! Death was the hour! Or possibly three in the morning. It’s past three in the morning now and I’m just as drunk now as I was then, so my actions make the most perfect sense in the world.

Is it FIRE in my eyes – - or the glow of MACHINES?? Watch how my fingers burn over the keys – - so sure what I do – - I HAVEN’T A CLUE!! YOUNG OFFENDER etc copyright Pet Shop Boys etc etc

Anyway, I found myself sitting in a large circle of humans… opposite a man I knew of old… to my REGRET!! His name was Pete and he had a habit of insinuating himself into conversations with people and then showering them with wrong opinions. For example, on a previous occasion, he’d told me that my own work was a load of foolishness – admittedly it was a ten pee comic I’d drawn with a biro, but still, HOW DARE HE ETC – and THEN to add an insult to all who lived to an insult to me personally, he said that JACK KIRBY COULDN’T TELL A STORY.

WELL EH WOT I MEAN TO SAY WOT CHIZ CHIZ CHIZ ETC

My course was clear. I had to lure him out and then give him a savage beating! I’m a violent man by nature after reading so much 2000AD and EC Comics, however my life of cowardly pacifism had not given me the knowledge of courtly challenges I needed. He had not spilled my pint and my girlfriend could not be looked at as she does not currently exist. I had to resort to desperate measures!

“If anyone thinks Jack Kirby could not tell a story… they are welcome to STEP OUTSIDE!” I bellowed.

My challenge was unanswered! Pah! Bosh! And so forth!

“Let me repeat! There is A DRUBBING in the offing to all those who care to disrespect Jack Kirby’s storytelling ability! A THOROUGH DRUBBING! Say the words of stroytelling disrespect and prepare to receive it! A DRUBBING!”

But even the offer of A DRUBBING could not arouse the sluggard! And with good reason, because he had gone to sleep. Or possibly he was pretending to be asleep in order to take the sensible option i.e. not humiliate us both. However I cannot help but remark that IN YE OLDENE DAYSE OF CHILVALREYE we would be lancing each other up the arse at dawn! AND MAYBE THAT’S WHAT OUR ASBO CHAV NATION REQUIRES. Look at our triumphant rugby victory against the frogs – TEN HOURS EARLIER THOSE MEN WERE SHOOTING MUSKET BALLS INTO EACH OTHER’S URINARY TRACTS. And that’s true.

Anyway, I’d like to offer an apology to Pete – not for challenging him as THAT IS WHAT MADE OUR ISLAND NATION GRATE ETC but for failing to follow up on this challenge by beating him senseless, and then, since he had no second in his duel, taking the place of his second and beating myself senseless also. THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN THE ACT OF A TRUE ENGLISHMAN

ETC

Post from: EveryJoe

I Cannot Tell A Lie Sir Chiz Chiz Chiz

For more of the beatings you’re needing, check out Bahlactus!

Post from: EveryJoe

Friday Night Fights!