Take, for example, Street Fighter. The video game is excellent, spawning dozens of sequels and spinoffs, and thrilling every Tom, Dick, Harry and Jane to the core of their very being. Street Fighter has touched a cross section of generations and races. Ask the oldest person on the block about the game and chances are he or she has heard about Street Fighter … or Guile … or Ryu … or Ken. In the same light, ask the kid down the street about the game, and he or she will tell you about the latest addition to the growing family of the game, Street Fighter IV.

The film adaptation (yes, the one starring Jean-Claude Van Damme as Guile), sadly, is a thing best forgotten. It’s only saving grace, at least for me, is the fact that it starred the late Golden Globe award-winning actor Raul Julia (either that or seeing a lot of Kylie Minogue in Cammy’s tanktop and short shorts getup).

Let’s hope the next film based on the popular franchise, Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li, will turn out better … waaaay better than it’s predecessor. Hmmm, regardless of how it’ll “look,” however, I’d probably still pay a few dollars so I can watch the beautiful Kristin Kreuk, Lana Lang of Smallville fame.

Eh, what about Mortal Kombat? It sucked a bit, too. The acting was a bit cheesy and most of the things you see in the video game (read: blood and gore) didn’t see the light of day in the film.

Italian plumber in bright red jumpers? Uhmm, let’s not talk about Super Mario Brothers.

On the other end of the scale, we have Tomb Raider, Resident Evil and the upcoming Max Payne movie. Now these are adaptations. No pulling punches, plenty of blood, gore and limbs flying around.

Here’s to another year of good film adaptations of video games. Now, if only some Hollywood bigshot would get the crazy idea of making a film out of Starcraft.

Hey, what’s a post about movies if you don’t have trailers! Here’s the latest trailer of the Max Payne movie:

Post from: EveryJoe

From video games to movies: The good, the bad, and the ugly

Film Gecko’s Jane Boursaw wrote:

I’m not sure how long this will stay online, but a new trailer for 20th Century Fox’s Max Payne has been leaked onto YouTube. It looks like an amazing movie.

The movie adaptation of the popular video game opens in theaters on October 17, and stars Mark Wahlberg, Chris O’Donnel, Beau Bridges, Ludacris, Mila Kunis, and Donal Logue.

I’m sure the “leak” was controlled … some sort of viral marketing for both the movie and the two video games that spawned the film, Max Payne and Max Payne: The Fall of Max Payne. And I heard that Max Payne 3 has been in the pipeline since 2004. Check out the number of videos that have cropped up since the July 10 leak.

Oh, and for those who haven’t seen the trailer, here’s a copy:

Post from: EveryJoe

Max Payne trailer: Leak or marketing gimmick?

Actually, there’s not much to talk about as game features go. The only news concerning The Goonies is the fact that it has already celebrated its 20th anniversary and that a remake of the classic game is now available as shareware. More on this later. For now, let me share a bit of video game history.

There are two versions of The Goonies video game, one for the MSX and another for the Nintendo Family Computer. A sequel, The Goonies II (duh!) was released for the Famicom a few years later. It should be pointed out that these versions of the game had little to do with the movie, but it featured the same set of characters. Take the Fratellis, for example. They’re still the bad guys in the video games.

In The Goonies video game, however, the Fratellis have managed to kidnap all of the Goonies (except Mikey, our lead protagonist in the game) and hide them in hidden cages across a map of caverns, mazes and abandoned buildings. Mikey’s goal: to rescue all the Goonies and free a mermaid named Annie. Where Annie is in the movie, I know not.

If you’re more of a movie tie-in buff, then the Datasoft-produced Goonies may be the video game for you. This version of the video game, which features eight screens where a player has to use two members of the Goonies to solve puzzles and reach an exit to advance to the next stage, was released for 8-bit computers like the Commodore 64, the ZX Spectrum, the Amstrad CPC, the Atari, and the Apple II (I played the game on this archaic machine). Unlike its MSX and Famicom counterpart, this version made use of designs from the actual sets and the puzzles seen in the movie.

Sigh. Those were the days. Hey, if you’re looking for a rush, why don’t you try the remake of the video game by Brain Games. The remake was made for the 2006 competition organized by Retro Remakes. Take a gander at these screenshots:

Post from: EveryJoe

The Goonies: 8-bit gaming goodness

I mean… what can I say? What excuse can I possible make to justify unleashing this horror?

I can’t justify the horrific ‘CGI’ flashing graphical nonsense, the use of ‘The Power’ by Snap, which was surely at this point some sort of ironic retro classic, or the decision to set this colourful, magical fantasy adventure at the bottom of a sewer at night. I can’t justify Bob Hoskins, or the nausea I feel at what looks like Luigi and the Princess getting together (EWWWW). I can’t justify Yoshi being some sort of Jurassic Park remnant. I can justify nothing. Je regrette tout.

Somebody somewhere must have been able to justify something, though, because somebody paid 45 million dollars to make this. In kidney machine terms that’s about thirty thousand alive children or something. Unfortunately, the movie grossed a mere 20 million, which is a significantly lower number of children given life-saving kidney support. Sorry, Bob Hoskins! Your film career is in another castle!

Apparently pre-teens liked it a lot. Other pre-teen favourites include sounds, colours and ritalin.

But if you’re a pre-teen, or you know somebody who is, you might want to go to this link, for no reason, nudge nudge, wink wink, and then click on certain other links while you’re there. A nod’s as good as a wink to a blind horse, squire.

Enjoy! If you can.

Post from: EveryJoe

Saturday Night Is Vomit Night

0:02 – David Lightman??!?? Why don’t they just call him Vernon VDU and be done with it?

0:14 – That’s telling him, Ferris! Now go and steal a porsche! Did this film come before Ferris Bueller? I have no idea, but if it did it explains how they cast that role as this is essentially a floppy-haired Ur-Ferris.

0:33 – Announcer Man is being a huge perv here. Plus more action from Ur-Ferris as he CHANGES his GRADES by HACKING i.e. his computer is magic and can do anything. Then Ur-Ferris attempts to say one of his trademark ‘cool’ lines, but fails miserably. Ur-Ferris is not very cool – worth noting that when he metamorphisises into Proper Ferris, he’s constantly bitching about his magic computer because it isn’t an equally magic car, which helps to raise his game somewhat. Ur-Ferris still manages to get an incredibly hot girl into his room but it seems like good luck rather than good judgement.

0:44 – Announcer Man explains things to mentally retarded children who may be watching this trailer and haven’t worked things out from the incredibly obvious action onscreen. “He found the right CODEWORD to PLAY the game. The duck says QUACK. The cow says MOO.” Although I suppose in the days before illegal downloading people would be scratching their heads madly at this point. Now we’d just see him go and get some warez and the rest of the film would be a RACE AGAINST TIME as he tries to get the virus he accidentally installed off his system before Hot Girl gets bored and goes home.

0:47 – HOLY GOODNIGHT that’s one evil-looking computer. I hope it isn’t… ALIVE!

0:58 – Ur-Ferris picks exactly the game I would in this situation, and makes exactly the face I would too.

1:11 – NOOOO the world’s bombs are mere toys in the hands of a child who doesn’t understand the true horror of what he might unleash! WHAT A BRILLIANT METAPHOR FOR THE COLD WAR! Why not enjoy this metaphor with a cool, refreshing can of TAB?

1:27 – Presumably this is Ur-Ferris realising what’s going on, as otherwise this would be quite a short and depressing film. It might make a good episode of the Twilight Zone, though. We’re getting a lot of scenes of people in TEH BIG BUNKER desperately running through their protocols, which is very chilling for a child of the eighties like me, who grew up with the constant spectre of the mushroom cloud hanging over his head – it still is, mind, but modern culture makes it easier to be distracted from it than ever before. What would be more chilling would be scenes of an incompetent, oddly ape-like man who is unable to process language being in charge of America’s nuclear arsenal, but even Ur-Ferris couldn’t cause that to happen. Unless he voted Republican during the last eight years. SATIRE.

1:39 – Ur-Ferris is getting less cool by the moment – he’s turning in a convincing portrayal of someone caught in a mire of despair, but not the pants-filling sobbing and quaking I’d expect from a teenager this deep in it. Possibly it’s because he’s being interrogated by The World’s Least Threatening Man.

1:54 – This bit works on two levels – one, the scenes of this NOT BEING A DRILL are very scary, particularly that line about being VERY CONFIDENT, and two, layered on top of this we have Ur-Ferris clearly telling anyone who’ll listen i.e. nobody that the computer has GONE MAD! Which means the chances of a peaceful settlement are zero.

2:02 – Putting this question at the end of the trailer seems slightly redundant, unless they’re trying to hint that ALL LIFE might be a game i.e. The Matrix. Nice chilling finisher, though – this Evil Computer is one of my favourite electronic bad guys now, thanks to the Speak And Spell quality evil of his sinister voice.

So, what is War Games about, judging by this trailer?

Ur-Ferris Bueller is the coolest nerd in the school and somehow impresses Hot Girl, but he’s only Ur-Ferris and instead of stealing a car they sit in his room and play on the computer. And drink Tab. Ur-Ferris downloads some abandonware but it’s not abandonware, it’s an Evil Computer in charge of the world’s nukes! He realises his mistake and tries to get help, but Captain Moustache thinks he’s a red! Meanwhile, the imminent apocalypse rushes on with Evil Computer pulling the strings! At the last moment, Ur-Ferris types in a philosophical question which reveals that actually his struggle against the Evil Computer is itself merely a game played by higher beings! Earth is annihilated and it is GAME OVER, but the supreme overlords deposit another Space Quarter and Ur-Ferris begins his school day all over again in a disturbing finish.

(Actually I did see this when I was a kid, so I know that – SPOILERS – Ur-Ferris makes Evil Computer play Noughts And Crosses to teach it the meaning of futility. But my ending is better.)

Post from: EveryJoe

Friday Night Is Movie Night: Do You Want To Play A Gaaaaame?