I’m only saying this because we’re friends, and I would be a bad friend if I didn’t tell you. And, you know, BECAUSE we’re friends, I feel like I can be totally honest with you about this: You need to put up a new photo or have no photo at all. You’re at WORK for goodness’ sake.

Seriously, we’ve been BFFs for, like, EVER, and even I am too embarrassed to link to you because you look like you’re at a FRAT party. Who cares that you graduated from an awesome school at the top of your class for undergrad and have a master’s degee at 25? The fact that you’re treating your LinkedIn profile like your MySpace page does NOT say anything good about your level of professionalism. (And did you miss the memo that MySpace is only cool if you’re 15??? Honey, please, you’re killing me here.)

Let me make it really simple:

• If I can see your cleavage, your photo should not be on LinkedIn.
• If I can see the part of your body where your leg connects to your butt, your photo should not be on LinkedIn.
• If you’re wearing 5 pounds of makeup, your photo should not be on LinkedIn.
• If you’re using a soft-focus lens, your photo should not be on LinkedIn.
• If the picture was taken while you were "out with the girls," your photo should not be on LinkedIn.

Need I go on? Grow. Up. If you want to be taken seriously, act like it. You’re putting yourself out there for the world to see, and your career is on the line. And so is the career of every person who connects to you.

You don’t have to wear a suit. You can be casual — just be nice-casual instead of slutty-casual.

Don’t be mad, okay? It’s just, you can do so much better. Love ya, hon.

Contents © Copyright 2008 Kristen King

Tags: women and business, women in business, women, woman, business, linkedin, linked in, online profile, social networking, business networking, professional networking, online image, glamour shot, photo, picture, avatar, skank, slut, ho, biz chicks rule, kristen king

Post from: EveryJoe

Great Profile, Bad Photo? Stop Shooting Yourself in the Foot Already

Ren Garcia
May 7, 2008 at 11:00 pm

Great pick-up lines, Kristen. Could lead to something heavier than networking.

My problem is the dead silence that comes after the entree. I always end up making up an excuse for a graceful exit.

Based on the tips we’ve already talked about, I’ll work with the assumption that you’ve got the "Hi, what’s your name? What do you do?" part covered. (If not, you should review.) But then what? Never fear — you have lots of options.

Choice #1: Break the ice with some honesty. "Ahh, don’t you just love those awkward silences at these things?" This may not work in every situation — it kind of depends on the other person — but when you say what the other person is thinking, it puts them at ease.

Choice #2: Put the ball back in their court. "So, what brings you here today?" People love to talk about themselves.

Choice #3: Pay them a compliment. "That’s a great belt/purse/business card/whatever. May I ask where you found it?" Be genuine, and make your new friend feel good.

Choice #4: Ask them a question about the organization or gathering. "This is my first time at Networking Doesn’t Have to Suck. Is there anyone you think I should meet while we’re here tonight?"

Choice #5: Ask them a question about the specific presentation you’ve seen or are about to see. "Have/had you attended a talk about making networking less sucky? What did you think about tonight? / What are you interested in about tonight’s talk?"

Choice #6: Ask them open-ended questions about their business. "I’ve never met a fill-in-the-blank before. How did you get into that field? What is your favorite part of fill-in-the-blank?"

Choice #7: Them how you think you might be able to help them. "You know, I have a colleague who’s looking for someone to do-what-you-do. Do you have a business card on you?" Important: Only use this one if you actually do know someone to whom you could make the referral.

There are dozens of other possibilities, but I don’t want to stifle your creativity by going on about this for ages. So now I’M going to put the ball in YOUR court (see #2). Was this helpful? Which of these ideas strikes you as something you could do? What ideas do you have? Leave a comment and let me know what’s on your mind.

Contents © Copyright 2008 Kristen King

Tags: women in business, women and business, women, woman, business, networking, awkward silence, uncomfortable, how to network, how to make conversation, how to make small talk, biz chicks rule, kristen king

Post from: EveryJoe

Networking Crisis, Solved: How to Deal With the Post-Introduction Awkward Silence

Unless you literally never leave your house, you already have all of the skills you need to be a successful networker because you use them every day when you interact with coworkers, service providers, people standing in like at the dry cleaners — every social situation you encounter on a daily basis.

Here’s are some tips to help you get past the "I hate networking" roadblock:

1. Stop telling yourself you’re bad at networking. It’s like walking down a long staircase and telling yourself you’re about to fall — just NOT a good idea. Instead, think about what you might learn by attending an event, or how interesting it might be to meet someone new. You don’t have to be all, "I’m SMART enough, I’m GOOD enough, and gosh darn it, people LIKE me," though you certainly can if you want to. Just don’t shoot yourself in the foot before you start running the race. Or something.
2. Make a point to recognize those professional networking opportunities that happen in day-to-day life. I ended up exchanging business cards with a guy on my plane back from Chicago this weekend after we started chit-chatting about something in SkyMall and the conversation turned to our jobs. Turns out we’re both interested in what the other does for a living. That was networking!
3. Put yourself out there. I guarantee that no matter where you live, there is SOME happening SOMEwhere nearby where you can practice your networking skills. Check with your local Chamber of Commerce. Visit the website of an organization that interests you to see what events they have coming up. Maybe the local university has a speaker you like followed by a cocktail reception. Create opportunities to meet strangers and learn about them.
4. Practice your pickup line. I have three that work really well for me, and which I choose depends on the situation: "Hi, what brings you here?" (variation, depending on your perception of the other person’s sense of humor: "What’re you in for?"); "Hey there, mind if I join you? I’m Kristen, what’s your name? What do you do, NAME?"; and "Hi, I’m Kristen. I don’t think I’ve met you yet. How’s your evening/morning/day going so far?" If you noticed that they’re basically all the same, pat yourself on the back. People are so happy that someone is talking to them at these things, they don’t care what you say as long as you say something and make an effort to start the conversation.
5. Set small goals. If you go into a crowded room with the idea in your head that you have to meet everyone there and speak to tons of strangers, no wonder you’re stressed out! Try breaking it down to something small: Talk to one stranger. Ask for one person’s business card. Raise your hand and ask a question if there’s a presenter. Give yourself a goal to reach, and then give yourself a reward when you get there.

I know these sound basic, but trust me, they work if you really apply these ideas. All of them.

If you stop telling yourself you’re bad at networking but then you never make any attempt to do it, it’s hard to have faith in your skills. If you attend events but refuse to talk to anyone there, it’s hard to get more comfortable with the idea.

Today, pick a FIRST STEP toward more confident networking. What do you want to do? It can be something small, even silly.

For me, I had to break a bad habit. Every time I go to an event, I always gravitate toward people I know. In when I went to SOBCon in Chicago last weekend, I didn’t know anyone there, so it wasn’t possible to fall in with my group — but I had to keep myself from clinging to the people I met the first afternoon. This was my goal going into it:

This weekend, I am going to make a point of sitting with people I don’t know every chance I get. Every meal, every presentation, every drink, every sight-seeing event. I will tell those people, "I’m trying to make a point of sitting with people I haven’t met yet so I can get to know more folks here. May I join you?" I will invite strangers to join me, especially people who look even more uncomfortable than I feel.

I’ll be honest: It was torture for the first couple of encounters, but then it got really fun. Best. Conference. Ever. And I’m so proud of myself for dong it!

What’s your step? What do you want to work on or try for the first time, or maybe for the second time and really stick with it?

Contents © Copyright 2008 Kristen King

Tags: women and business, women in business, business advice for women, learning how to network, professional networking, networking events, i hate networking, im scared of networking, networking is hard, tips for networking, how to network, networking, anxiety, meeting new people, how to network at conferences, SOBCon, biz chicks rule, kristen king

Post from: EveryJoe

If You Hate Networking, You’re Not Doing it Right — 5 Tips for Getting Comfortable With Networking

Tune in to www.1100KFNX.com to listen live on Sunday. Listeners can call in or e-mail with questions, and I hope you will take advantage of the opportunity! If you miss it, recordings are available online in an archive. Comments on my brilliance and stunning beauty are welcome and encouraged. Or, you know, you may want to talk about networking, too. Please listen in!

Contents © Copyright 2008 Kristen King

Tags: women in business, woman, business, kristen king, live radio interview, gabe goldberg, IMI TechTalk, tom d’auria, freelance writing, professional networking

(photo credit: Umer Saud)

Post from: EveryJoe

Don’t Touch That Dial: KK on Live Radio Interview Sunday at 5 p.m. EST

Gabe and I will be speaking on networking in at the DC chapter of 40plus on Monday, January 28, 2008. Here’s the info.

Contents © Copyright 2008 Kristen King

Tags: kristen king, gabe goldberg, networking, 40plus, washington post, freelance writing

Post from: EveryJoe

KK Featured in the Sunday Washington Post

off with their heads!

Ridiculous, isn’t it? That’s about how ridiculous it would be to hold social networking sites like Facebook or MySpace responsible for the action(s) of their members. When people join these forums, become members and active participants, they take on certain inherent risks that they are responsible for:

1. Disclosing personal information
2. Other users/visitors accessing and viewing their personal information
3. Chatting with complete strangers. Yes, they’re strangers even if they are online.

Laura from Business and Blogging and I were paired up to discuss this “problem” that is being fought and debated in the online world. You can read Laura’s point-of-view here to see what she has to say. We LOVE having fun here at b5media and this was a lively discussion we thought we’d talk up to see also what others thought about it.

To briefly continue on my diatribe, users who are Facebooker’s or MySpacer’s cannot and should not hold the site administrators responsible for the actions of its members. There are literally millions of social networkers who are on these sites every single day. Social networking is fast becoming a more preferred method of communication and its popularity is growing exponentially. As I mentioned earlier, with this growth comes certain risks that the users take and the site owners should not be held responsible for. To protect yourself on a social networking site, the following steps can help you to avoid any potentially difficult situations:

*Only users the age of 14 and older should sign up. Not 13. Age – 14.

*Do not give “correct” information. Change your birth date to be off one month. The day to be off a couple of days. Do not give out accurate information to complete strangers.

*Use a proxy site to enjoy the forums without divulging IP addresses or personal information. Proxy sites are wonderful for anonymous users.

MySpace and Facebook are expected to grow even faster with users coming online everyday. I signed up with Facebook at the end of last year and with MySpace a couple of weeks ago. I already have “friends” who want to meet me and chat. I don’t have a clue as to who they are, where they are and what they want. It’s a good thing I’m way too busy right now to socialize! But when I do, and I will, I will take all of the necessary precautions to ensure my safety and keep myself from dangerous situations.

MySpace and Facebook isn’t responsible for that. I am.

Post from: EveryJoe

If Facebook and MySpace Are Responsible Then…

1. Contact the client at least once a week to once every two weeks with an email, article or news clipping story that is relevant to their industry. Write a brief 1-2 sentence blurb about your thoughts or opinion on the subject. This shows your interest in them as a client, your expert opinion on the article and keeps your name in front of them at all times.

2. Attend Chamber of Commerce luncheons, with business cards (lots) in hand and a smile on your face.

3. Send them a newsletter, snail mail or ezine, about your industry and what you’re doing.

4. Always, always, always ask them how they are doing on a personal level. This shows concern and that you’re interested in building a relationship, not just in their checkbook. But, if you’re not genuinely concerned, don’t ask and don’t fake it. They can tell the difference.

What are some other tips that you have tried that have worked for you in networking?

Post from: EveryJoe

In 2008 – - Networking Ideas For Your Business

When is the last time you Googled yourself?

Okay, I can see that you’re back now. What did you find? Are you listed at previous places of employment? Do you see activities and affliations from college? Maybe a few professional organizations? These are all good things.

But what else came up? One writing colleage confessed to me that she shares a name with an erotic writer whose website borders on pornographic. A design colleague revealed on his blog that someone with his same name was attemtping to piggyback on his search engine rankings. Others have been maligned by former coworkers and schoolmates, and some have been targeted by strangers.

Some folks make their own troubles online by posting inappropriate photos, tons of personal information (fights with your mom, your reproductive issues, a rant about that stupid boss of yours), or just not being online at all.

How can you start the new year off with a clean slate in the online world? It may not be possible to eradicate every piece of negative information about you online, but you can make a big difference with these 5 easy steps.

• Delete your own content. That “secret” blog of yours probably isn’t as secret as you think. If you’re just using it to vent, switch to a paper journal, or something stored locally on your computer rather than online for all the world to see.
• Remove incriminating photos. Yes, I’m sorry, but that shot of you stealing the office copier has to go. So do drunk photos, wild party photos, and and crazy make-out photos.
• Say goodbye to MySpace. Even if your page is pristine, you can’t control what your friends are doing, and a great judge of a gal’s character is the company she keeps. Stay connected via e-mail, not comments, “friend”ships, and bulletins. (Others disagree with me, but I stand firm on this one.)
• Request that your stuff be taken down. If you have content or photos that are potentially negative on a site you don’t control, contact the webmaster and ask that they remove it. Be sure to specify the exact conten and its location, and be very, very polite.
• Set up a Google Alert for your name. Google will give you a free e-mail notification every time your name or your busines name appears online.

Keeping your ‘net nose clean is a good idea for both the self-employed and those working for others. Your potential clients and employers will inevitably check you out. Make sure they’re seeing what you want them to see!

If the results of your Google search were woefully slim, consider joining a professional networking site such as LinkedIn to get some career background information about yourself out there for the finding. You may also want to join an online forum or bulletin board in your area of expertise and post some helpful comments on a regular basis. Use your full name in your post signature line for best results. Just be cautious about engaging in harsh debates. What may seem witty when you first say it may turn into a head-slapper a few months down the line.

What’s the worst thing you’ve ever found in your online image? Anonymous comments are completely acceptable for this one!!!

Addendum: Great minds think alike!

Contents © Copyright 2008 Kristen King

(photo via SXC.hu)

Tags: women and business, woman, business, online image, networking, career search, professionalism, myspace, linkedin, google

Post from: EveryJoe

Your Internet Image: Smoothing the Rough Spots and Creating a Positive Online Persona

For 2008, the main thing I want to accomplish with my blog at Biz Chicks Rule is to increase the readership by at least 50% in the first quarter. Kristen King (who also writes several other wonderful blogs) and I co-blog this b5media blog and are brainstorming ideas and ways to increase our readership. We have both set goals and deadlines to meet those goals and plan to hit the ground running (hard) in 2008. One thing that we have definitely decided to do is network and connect with other women in business and interview them and ask them to guest blog on Biz Chicks Rule. The blogosphere is chock full of fierce women bloggers and we intend to find them, interview them, find out their “secrets” and bring them to you. This contest is great for me as a motivational starter to get things “crunk” in just a few short days.

On your mark…get set…go!!

Post from: EveryJoe

Time To Make Those New Year’s Resolutions – - A Contest With Pimp Your Work

We’re drawing closer to the end of the year and there are many business start-ups that will be forming in 2008. Will you be one of them?

Check out this great article I found on tasks to consider when starting your own business. Let me know how things go for you. Any questions? Let me know that too!

Bridget

Post from: EveryJoe

Focus on Starting A Business in 2008